Spontaneous Combustion

It's been awhile since my last post and there is a good reason for it. I've been extremely busy chasing around a toddler for the past couple months. A baby is usually not defined as a toddler until age one; however, our little girl is toddling all over the place...behind her walker that is. She is flying around the house in high gear most of the time. She became proficient at crawling over night and does laps around the house with grace and ease. I was nervous for her mobility to kick in but I now find it refreshing and sweet. Clara will follow me from room to room as she still will not let me out of her sight. I can tell how proud she is of her newly found freedom. I'm so happy for her and look forward to her learning more day by day!

B.C. (Before Clara), I had never heard of the term "high needs baby" and assumed that it referred to colic. I now know that babies will outgrow colic whereas high needs is often associated with temperament. These babies will in many cases grow up to be high needs children.

As a newborn, folks were quick to give advice about how to handle Clara. I was told that she needed to use a pacifier even though there was no way she would take one. This was not an option for her and she would not be easily fooled. I was also told to let her cry it out and she would eventually sooth herself to sleep. I knew my daughter too well, even at such a young age, she had no ability to self-sooth, this was a skill that she would have to learn. (At seven months those skills are yet to be developed!) Strangers would tell me that she must be in pain because she cries so much or that they were sure she had a hernia. My motherly instinct told me that she was perfectly healthy but I was still desperate for answers as to why she was such a particular baby. Comforting her was difficult and all I wanted was for her to feel safe, loved and happy.

In my quest for answers I found Dr. Sears' page on high needs children. He wrote a whole book dedicated to high needs babies based on his own experience with his high needs daughter. This book was as valuable as pure gold not only because of the helpful tips and advice it offered, but also because it helped me to realize that Clara's needs were not a result of my parenting style. In fact, I was spot on with my hands-on, attached-to-the-hips (and breasts) approach.


http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/fussy-baby/high-need-baby/12-features-high-need-baby